by Mandy Simms
When your child has ADHD, you’d better buckle up and hold on, because you’re in for a bumpy ride
My sister-in-law Jenny had just given birth to a brand-new baby boy named Liam. Eager to meet him, we piled in the car and rushed to the hospital. And we weren’t disappointed: he was a perfect little poppet, cradled in his mother’s arms.
“He doesn’t sleep much,” Jenny said, looking tired. And it was true. Liam didn’t need much sleep and was incredibly active, particularly for a baby.
“He’ll grow out of it,” I said, reassuringly. But he never did.
When Liam was 18 months old, Jenny called me. “He’s been up on the roof today,” she said, sniffing back tears. My first thought was that Liam must have climbed up an old ladder that his dad Jim had left propped against the house. No such luck. Liam had hot-footed it up a trellis, instead, and begun merrily running around the roof. Panic-stricken, Jenny sought help from a male neighbour who, thankfully, was able to bring him down safely.
When he was two, Liam found a butter knife lying on the kitchen bench and rammed it into the toaster. Boom! The lights went out.
“The toaster bit me, Mummy!” Liam cried, showing Jenny a small burn hole at the end of his finger. Once again, Jenny rang me in tears.
The next day, an electrician came to the house and installed a safety switch, but that didn’t stop Liam. Over the next few years, he managed to blow up his older brother’s electric guitar, and short-circuited the house on so many occasions that it was not uncommon to see long extension cords running from the shed while the wiring was being fixed. One day, Jenny heard a familiar electrical pop and raced outside. Liam had chopped through the extension cord with an axe.
When Liam was five, Jenny took him to visit her brother Scott. Liam was acting up, as usual, and Jenny was kept busy trying to keep him quiet. Suddenly, Liam became too quiet, so Scott went outside to see why. When Jenny came out soon afterwards, she found Scott catatonic on the front porch, visibly shocked at what he was seeing. Scott was trying to speak but no words would come out. Eventually he squeaked, “Why did you do that, Liam?”
Scott was an educated man with a degree, and he probably thought Liam would come up with a feasible explanation. But Liam was only five years old and there was no plausible excuse for pouring five litres of black car oil over the porch and paddling around in it.
Later, after they’d cleaned up the oil spill as best they could, they discovered Liam had “done something” to Scott’s computer while they were outside. Whatever it was, the computer didn’t like it at all.
Scissors were another thing Liam loved as a small boy and he would regularly use them to chop up his school uniform. Being an armchair psychologist, I suggested to Jenny that maybe he was having problems at school.
“No, I don’t think that’s it,” she said rather sternly.
Liam also loved to cut his hair. He once did a rather interesting undercut, and another time tried to shave his name into his head. Of course, these artistic haircuts would always happen the night before the school photo was due to be taken. In fact, whenever there was an important event coming up, Liam would always do us the honour of providing something interesting to talk about. A focal point, if you will.
When Liam was 11, his grandmother began planning a birthday party for herself and a close friend. They were both turning 70. They had been friends since Year 1 in school and it was going to be a very special occasion indeed. Planning was in full swing and everyone had a role to play. Liam was delegated the job of waiter and was shown how to politely serve glasses of sherry to the old ladies.
The only trouble was, Liam badly needed a haircut – something his grandmother pointed out to Jenny a week before the party. Jenny went white with fear. There was something she’d been putting off telling her mother, but now there was no way out of it.
“Liam’s already had a haircut,” she stammered nervously.
Nana could tell by the look on Jenny’s face that there was more to the story. She waited with pursed lips to hear the rest.
“He cut it himself,” Jenny blurted out.
Now Nana hails from an era where children just behaved themselves, so she could never really quite understand Liam’s wild ways. Nevertheless, she tried to remain calm.
“There’s more, Mum,” Jenny said.
This time Nana held onto Jenny’s arm for stability. She looked at Jenny with a pleading expression that said: Please, not two days before my party. Eventually she summed up the nerve to ask, “What else did he do?”
She knew she was going to be shocked. But she had been dealing with Liam’s shocks for 11 years.
“He shaved off his eyebrows, too,” Jenny said.
Why Liam would do such a thing was unfathomable to the rest of the family. Most kids cut their hair once when they are in preschool, but Liam did it repeatedly. It didn’t matter how many times he was sat down and told not to, he would argue black and blue there was nothing wrong with it. It didn’t bother him if other kids laughed at him. It didn’t faze him at all. It was almost as if everyone else had the problem.
So why not just hide the scissors? Every item that could possibly tempt Liam is hidden in Jenny’s home. Matches, razors, big knives, scissors. The last time I checked, Jenny was hiding the scissors outside the laundry in a drain-hole with a grate over it. But it won’t do any good.
Liam was diagnosed with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) when he was three years old. He started taking medication when he was six, because that’s when other people began having problems with his behaviour. While the medication has made him less hyperactive, it hasn’t stopped his impulsive behaviour.
Today Liam is 14 and attends an “alternative” school. His particular problem can’t be catered for in a government school. He has trouble reading social cues and has difficulty with tact. He once told a teacher, “Mum thinks all teachers should be horsewhipped for going on strike.” Unfortunately it was the week after the teacher’s union had done just that.
I guess you could say that having Liam in our family is a bit like going on a trip to Disneyland – minus the flight to Los Angeles. It’s full of ups and downs, shocks and scares, madness and mayhem. But it’s also often a lot of fun, full of priceless moments, lots of laughter and, of course, love. With Liam, you never know what’s going to happen next. And that’s the most interesting part.
Mandy Simms, 46, lives in Ballajura, WA, with her husband Brad and daughters Brooke, Cass and Alyssa. She works in patient services at Glengarry Private Hospital in Perth.
ADHD in Australian children
Between 3% and 5% of Australian children have ADHD. The symptoms usually appear before a child enters school, and boys are about three times more likely to be affected than girls. The main symptoms are inattention, hyperactivity and impulsivity. ADHD children are constantly on the go, fidgeting or, in some cases, talking incessantly. They often act without thinking and blurt out inappropriate comments.
What causes ADHD? Scientists now consider genes to be one of the strongest factors. One theory is that the cortex and the limbic system in the brain (which normally inhibit impulsive behaviour) don’t function properly. This could be because of an imbalance in the brain’s neurotransmitters (message-transmitting chemicals).
The most common medications for ADHD are stimulants such as Ritalin, Attenta, Concerta and dexamphetamine. These drugs address the neurotransmitter imbalance. About 17% of Australian children with ADHD are currently on medication. However, researchers are confident that not all children with ADHD require medication – some respond well to behavioural training.
For more information, visit
www.adhdnews.com.
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